I’m tired of still being able to spot you in a crowd. I no longer like being able to pick up your voice a midst all the white noise. I don’t want to be able to recognize your work. I hate how I can’t listen to great music without remembering you. I can’t go places without flashbacks. The simple association with my day to day activities needs to cease because I’m tired of my past dragging me down. The fact that I have moved on is irrefutable, but to say I have let go is questionable.
Regardless of the random nights I would lie awake and think about my exes, I found happiness being alone. I started to like the responsibility of not prioritizing someone’s feelings. I practiced a type of independence I never really had the chance to try out. I learned to not fall for the next guy that made me smile and called me beautiful. Just because they can make you laugh or they show you new things or take you to new places doesn’t automatically make them a keeper. Before you, I was learning things about myself I would have never admitted to with the previous guys I had affiliated with. I must admit there was still bitterness and cynicism in me prior to you, but after establishing an ‘us’ I learned to trust again.
I was happy without you and I am happier with you.
There is no doubting the genuineness of my desire to be with the one who I feel the most at ease with. My viewpoints have not been changed but only challenged by some of yours; and I always love a good debate. My faith is still unwavered and my standards are still far-fetched. I have such respect for the man you are. I have immense adoration for your sincere kindness toward me. My feelings for you are unconditional. I never imagined love to be so intricate yet so simple.